Eva Mendes breaks down in tears while revealing she is trying to stop 'yelling' at her and Ryan Gosling's daughters

Eva Mendes may be private when it comes to sharing photos of the family she shares with Ryan Gosling, but she's always candid about the challenges of motherhood. As a mother to two daughters, Esmeralda and Amada, The self-proclaimed Cuban mami has opened up about her difficulties, including the habits she's working to unlearn from her upbringing. During an appearance on "Parenting & You With Dr. Shefali," Eva shared that one of the toughest challenges she's dealing with is breaking the pattern of "yelling."

"I don't yell in a harsh way, like telling them to 'shut up,' but it's still yelling," she admitted. "It's not about being mean, but it's the yelling itself that feels cultural to me."

© Parenting & You With Dr. Shefali

Eva grew emotional as she discussed the impact of this behavior. "I really don't want to raise my kids with fear," she said, tearing up. I hope I don't look back in 20 years and regret it because it's so unfair to them."

Reflecting on her childhood, Eva, who is the daughter of Eva Pérez Suárez and Juan Carlos Méndez, explained that her upbringing involved a lot of chaos and yelling. She also acknowledged that although she grew up in a loving home, there was also a significant element of fear. "In my 20s, I was determined not to be like my parents," Eva confessed. "But now, I'm shocked at how much I'm like my mother. I adore her, but my childhood was full of anxiety and turmoil, even though my family was loving."

Now 50, Eva admits that the hardest part of parenting is rushing and yelling. "It's something I'm really struggling with," she said. 

She also reflected on her mother's difficult upbringing, which was filled with trauma. Eva shared that growing up in the U.S. while her family had fought to get there left her feeling guilty about complaining. "I think about how good I have it compared to what my mom went through, and it makes me feel ashamed."

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When it comes to her decision to step back from the spotlight, Eva called it "the easiest choice I've ever made." She knew she wanted to focus on her children while they were young because those years would shape their future. Eva has also said she's grateful for becoming a mother later in life. "In my 20s, I wasn't ready," she admitted. "I was too wild and immature. Now, I'm in a much better place to raise kids."

The author of "Desi, Mami, and the Never-Ending Worries" shared during an interview with HOLA! USA anxiety can manifest in various ways. She experienced anxiety as a child but noticed an increase after becoming a mother. "It took so long for me to relax a little bit after [giving birth], but I remember that I had one baby after another; I remember it so viscerally, like, I would spend nights just staring at them and going, like, 'Oh, my God, what if something happens to me?' And it's that spiral," she said. "But I think so much of that is also what we're going through hormonally."

© Eva Mendes

Eva discovered matrescence during her quest to understand her experiences. "I started looking stuff up because after I had my babies, I was like, This is so overwhelming, these feelings. So it didn't feel like I was depressed; I was anxious. There's this wonderful word called matresonance, and it's basically the process of a woman becoming a mother. And I was like, 'Why don't we know this word in society, and why don't we talk about this?" she questioned. "I personally feel like our society doesn't value parenthood, and specifically motherhood, parenthood, it doesn't value it the way it should. There's not enough value placed on it."

"That, to me, is the craziest thing in the world. We are doing the most important jobs of the world. We are raising the future, and we're doing it a lot of times at our expense. So much is involved, including our mental wellness and everything," Mendes told HOLA! USA.