When talking about celebrity moms and kids, Reese Witherspoon and Ava Phillippe are names that increasingly pop up. The mom and daughter duo look incredibly alike, which continues to surprise people as Ava grows up. In an appearance on the Today Show, Witherspoon said she and her daughter don’t see it that way.

When discussing Witherspoon and her daughter, host Jenna Bush Hager said that the two were twins. “She and I don’t see [the resemblance] that much,” said Witherspoon, who has two kids with her ex-husband Ryan Phillippe – Ava, 23, and Deacon, 18. Witherspoon also has a 10-year-old son named Tennessee with her current husband Jim Toth.

In the episode, Witherspoon talked about parenting and how it evolves over the years, with kids growing up and demanding different things from their parents. “You establish a different relationship,” she said. “First of all, you’re managing them a lot when they’re little and it’s very physical. And then it’s more emotional support. And suggestions, not telling them what to do when they get a little bit older.”

When speaking about older kids, she said that it’s important to continue to pay attention to that relationship and to adapt to what it asks of you. “But you have to really nurture your adult relationship with your children too. And give them respect and space to become who they are, not who you want them to be,” she said.

Witherspoon often posts and talks about her kids, sharing their achievements with the world. On Ava’s birthday, Witherspoon shared a sweet message. “Every day that I get to watch you become the most amazing woman is such a gift. Your gigantic heart, generous spirit, and endless creativity inspire me every day. I love you so much,” she wrote.