It's no secret that having kids can be stressful, but it turns out three might be the ultimate stress test for parents. According to a TODAY Parents survey, moms with three children report higher stress than those with more and fewer.
The survey goes back to 2013, when they asked more than 7,000 U.S. mothers to rate their stress on a scale of 1-10. The average was 8.5, but they found that mothers of three reported more stress than those with one or two.
Psychiatrist Dr. Janet Taylor, who has four children, said the move from 2 to 3 was jarring. "Everything was turned upside down. I did not feel like I had it together," she told TODAY. "Just crossing the street and not being able to physically hold all their hands, I found tremendously stressful.”
Interestingly enough, mothers with four or more reported lower stress levels. One of those reasons could be that they have an older child who can help, or they're so used to it, and striving for perfectionism is out the window.
Taylor explains, “There’s just not enough space in your head for perfectionism when you get to four or more kids." "You have to let go… and then you’re just thankful when they all get to school on time," she continued.
Why are mothers so stressed?
An 8.5 out of 10 when it comes to stress is very high. The survey revealed some eye-opening stats: 46% of moms say their partners stress them out more than their kids, 72% stress about how stressed they are, and 60% cite lack of time as the biggest source of tension. Plus, nine out of ten moms admitted to stressing about staying fit and attractive.
An exercise you can try
If you are finding this all too relatable, Dr. Taylor has a quick trick for frazzled parents: grab a piece of paper and draw a pie chart of how you actually spend your day.